Big Island

“We’re coming in for a lunar landing,” the Fish Man commented.

“My sister told me it would be like this,” Mrs.Fish responded.

“What a change from Kauai,” they both murmured.

Gone was the lush foliage and colorful flowers. Lying before them was the biggest pile of lava rock they had ever seen. It looked more like the surface of the moon than what they had pictured Hawaii looking like.

“What’s up with all of the white rocks laid out over the lava flow in the shape of words?” he thought.

“Hawaiian graffiti,” Mrs. Fish explained.

The Fish Man glanced at his wife with amusement. He knew he hadn’t said anything out loud, but she had developed an uncanny ability to read his mind.

They later discovered the white rocks were coral rocks taken from the beach area used by the local people to make statements on the contrasting dark brown lava. The only other variation in the rock was where one lava flow had overlapped a previous flow, creating a slightly different color and texture. Oh, there were a few plants in the landscape, but they were obviously placed there by man and not natural. Utility workers worked shirtless by the side of the road. One guy worked in a hole while another held a beach umbrella for shade.

“Wow!” “Even a great tan wouldn’t be worth doing that job,” he panted, “Well, I might be able to hold the umbrella…..if I had a lamp and a remote control…..and maybe an ashtray…that’s all I would need.”

“Can we go back to Kauai?” moaned the Fish Man. He hadn’t been looking forward to this part of the trip. They would now be mostly on company time. Mrs. Fish would have to attend meetings and he would have to try and make conversation with a bunch of people he didn’t know.

The Resort
Twenty minutes after leaving the airport, they spotted their resort. It was much like what he had pictured an oasis in the desert looking like. Springing out of the barren rock were palm trees and lawn. Multi-colored hues of blue and turquoise were highlighted by white-capped waves as the ocean pounded the shoreline. A beautifully manicured strip of lawn was being watered by a sprinkler system and a series of thundering waterfalls were on the right. They were now entering the Waikaola Village Resort, the largest resort in all the Hawaiian Islands.

The resort was comprised of 3 separate hotel buildings that varied greatly in shape, and were arranged in loose horseshoe pattern. In the center of the horseshoe was a beautiful lagoon. A waterfall created lots of turbulence as it fell approximately15 feet from a man-made cliff. Resort guests cruised the lagoon in about 20 paddleboats. Other guests were swimming about in flippers, snorkels and masks. A series of paths crisscrossed the resort grounds, leading under the waterfall and over several bridges that spanned narrow areas of the lagoon system. The lagoon, they soon discovered, was comprised of 3 varying sized lobes and was fed by natural sea water. Snorkelers could exit the lagoon and find themselves in a larger bay of the ocean. The 3 sides of the bay were surrounded entirely by resort property. The northern most part of the resort was taken up by the golf course.

After leaving their car with valet parking, the Fish Man and Mrs. Fish pulled their luggage cart into the reception area. They had to stop for the train which was used to transport guests between the different hotel buildings and after crossing over a bridge, they were hit by a huge crowd of people waiting to get rooms. It seems the company that took over the resort the week before was not anxious to leave this paradise and all checked out late. There were probably 1,000 hot and cranky people left to bake out in the tropical sun. Many of these people had come from the mainland and were not really dressed for the occasion. Taking over 4 hours to rectify the situation, the Fish’s were left to stand in lines and tote their luggage around the grounds. This wouldn’t have been so bad except for the heat. They decided to find some lunch and made their way to an island restaurant for a burger and beer.

As they were crossing the bridge to the grill, they had to push past a large group of people watching a demonstration in another lagoon pool that was separated from the main lagoon by a gate under their bridge. To their amazement, the demonstration was by the keepers of the resort’s captive dolphins. Apparently, the guests could sign up for a lottery type system and win chances to swim and interact with these dolphins. The Fish Man and Mrs. Fish would come back here several more times to watch the dolphins. The most enjoyable time was during the welcome party the first night, as they lounged with drinks in hand and only the light of tiki torches to illuminate the splashing silhouettes of the dolphins as they frolicked in their pool.

River of Marine Fish
Finally getting into their room was a great relief after a long afternoon in the sun. They were in the southernmost hotel building which happened to be the one next to the dolphin pool. Of course, they were on the other side of the hotel so they didn’t have a view of them. Directly below then was the tennis courts which was no big thrill, but just past that was quite an extensive view of the ocean. Their hotel building was actually two parallel rectangular buildings connected to an open air hallway at each end. The result was an open courtyard inside this complex. A saltwater canal ran through the courtyard making a turnaround loop at the end. This canal was a waterway for antique looking wooden boats which connected all of the hotel complexes like the train did. The bottom level of their hotel building was occupied by high-end retail stores, including an art gallery with a very large saltwater aquarium. The Fish Man guessed the aquarium to be about 200 gallons in capacity which was only occupied by 6, not very large, fish. He would later get a chance to see the maintenance person working on the aquarium. The Hawaiian Fish Guy could drain the water directly into the canal. New water was created from synthetic mixes though.

The canal itself was one of the highlights of the Fish Man’s visit to Hawaii. It was filled with marine fish, most of which he had kept at one time or another. Being only about 3 feet deep, the fish were highly visible. A school of around 30 Yellow Tangs with bulging bellies, glowed in the sun, as they grazed on some tufts of algae. Powerfully swimming Naso Tangs, all about 12 to 15 inches in length, cruised past. They exhibited a series of dangerous looking scalpels on their sides directly in front of their tails. Princess Parrotfish were also plentiful, but they always seemed to travel alone. Of course, there were also Convict Tangs which seemed to be the most plentiful fish on their visit to the islands. A school of about 8 or 9, three foot long blue fish, which the Fish Man couldn’t identify and couldn’t make up a name for, were quite startling as they blew past with lightening like speed. They were contrasted by swarms of hundreds of small fish which resembled some type of the wild-mollies the Fish Man had kept in the past.

“This place is just too cool!” the Fish Man drooled. He would have been content to spend the next 3 days sitting in the canal side coffee shop/boat stop and watching this wonderful merger of aquarium type display with a functional waterway. Mrs. Fish had other ideas, though. She was now quite intent on finding a good spot on the beach. He reluctantly followed, glancing back at the canal for one last look.

The Beach, Lagoon & Snorkeling
The beach was on the opposite side of the lagoon from the hotel and was obviously man-made. It offered a view over the lagoon of all of the 3 hotel complexes and grounds. It was quite spectacular. They waited a short while for a couple of lounge chairs to open up. Mrs. Fish had come armed with her trusty paper backed book and was ready to settle in for the long haul. Only about 5 minutes passed before Fish Man was getting antsy and began eyeing the little hut that rented the paddleboats and snorkel equipment.

“Maybe I’ll see how much it costs to rent some equipment,” the Fish Man said, looking for a response.

“Go for it,” Mrs. Fish offered quickly.

“YEEESSSS!” he thought as he took off for the rental hut. He was soon glad he hadn’t wasted the day sucking down coffee and staring into some old canal. The water was quite a bit more murky than when he had snorkeled in the ocean especially as he got near the waterfall. The fish were also quite a bit different. He estimated the lagoon varied from 3 to 25 feet deep and every depth had different fish. Many areas had pairs of Butterfly fish tending what appeared to be nests, He saw Raccoon Butterflies, Reticulated Butterflies, Moorish Idols and several other very large pairs tending to their nests. The open water had a great variety of wrasses, parrotfish, Dogface Puffers, filefish, trumpetfish and many others. He decided to cruise closer to the waterfall area of the lagoon. The turbid water cut down on visibility to only a couple of feet. He strained to see if their were any fish in this area when out of the corner of his eye he spotted a head the diameter of a grapefruit, only inches from his face. A huge mouth, which looked like it could inflict serious pain, was right next to his eye. His head jerked out of the water, much to the delight of some nearby guests on a paddleboat. The huge face belonged to a green sea turtle with a body over 3 feet in diameter. The turtle seemed quite unconcerned by the Fish Man’s presence as it lazily swam by. “I guess he couldn’t see me coming any better than I couldn’t see him,” he thought as he tried to regain his composure. The Fish Man would spot 3 such turtles during his excursions in the lagoon.

Near Death 100 Feet Under Water (OK, I Exaggerate!)
The next day, the Fish Man and Mrs. Fish would get another chance to view some fish close up and personal, but the circumstances were not pleasant. As one of the company sponsored events, they had chosen a submarine ride. Still having not completely shaken the motion sickness and anxiety of the long plane ride, the bus ride and the diesel fumes were starting to take a toll on the Fish Man. He was starting to get a little nervous about the submarine ride as well.

The bus dropped them and the other company employees off at a dock where a boat took them out to where the submarine was waiting. They discovered they were about the only Americans on the sub. Most of the passengers were from Brazil and only spoke Portuguese. The guests on the submarine were situated in seta in the center of the craft facing out. Everyone was back-to-back and butt to butt sideways as they peered out the porthole windows. Mrs. Fish was seated directly on his left and a really attractive Brazilian woman was on his right. It was quite a friendly situation,, unfortunately, he was beginning to think he was going to commit a very unfriendly act. His stomach was getting very queasy and he adjusted the airplane type blowers to give him as much air as possible. He was sweating bullets as he glanced over at the woman next to him. She gave him a little smile and he turned away thinking to himself, “you might not be smiling in a minute.”

The submarine was supposed to descend to 100 feet below the surface and he began to watch the digital counter which showed their current depth.

“Faster…..faster,” he silently urged the sub as he began to squirm in his seat. 28, 30, 35 feet the craft slowly dived. He was beginning to think he might survive when the sub stopped at 40 feet. Fish were swarming all around the windows. Divers from the surface were feeding the fish for the entertainment of the passengers. One diver slowly went by with a sign welcoming the company to Hawaii.

“I don’t have time for this, I’m going to blow,” the Fish Man wanted to scream.

The descent soon began again and before long they were resting on the bottom of the ocean at 100 feet. He began to see the light at the end of the tunnel knowing that they were at least half way done. The fish viewing was of no interest to him at this point. He was overjoyed to finally reach the surface. He had not created an international incident between the U.S. and Brazil and most of all he had not totally embarrassed himself.

That evening they were required to attend a formal dinner and awards party. At 5:00 o’clock the festivities kicked off with a cocktail party on the lawn. This too, was formal, meaning suits and ties in 95 degree heat, outside in the sun. To top it off, they were going to have their pictures taken as couples.

“I hope they can airbrush out all the sweat balls and stains on my shirt,” he grumbled. He did enjoy the sight of the guy in the tuxedo and short pants, though. “I wish I had thought of that,” the Fish Man joked.

“Like I would be seen with you dressed like that,” Mrs. Fish blurted back at him. “I didn’t get the impression that his boss had much of a sense of humor,” she smirked. “This might get interesting.”

The Trip Comes to an End
The Fish Man and Mrs. Fish found they had more free time than they anticipated. This time was spent exploring the southern part of the island on the other side of the airport. We went through several small towns on the Kona Coast and visited the sight of an ancient Hawaiian village. This area did have some beautiful foliage. It is the heart of the coffee industry that the Kona Coast is known for. Two days and several parties later they were back on the airplane headed back to Michigan and their two daughters. Overall it was a very enjoyable experience for the Fish Man and Mrs. Fish. They would like to someday come back to visit this very interesting place although, the next time they would skip the submarine ride. The end